I was never been burned,
not until I play fire.
Now see how it turned,
when I become a liar.
I jumped in to see a glimpse
of what is happiness inside.
But now it doesn’t make sense,
there’s nothing more to hide.
I was not ready for this;
to face the reality of me.
Struggling to find what I miss
and see how change can be.
I was naked facing the daylight.
I was free to go at sunset.
Then if I already know what is right,
Why did I go for a bet?
French ‘Portrait of a Man (Victor Considérant?)’, after 1830
Oil on canvas, 28.5 x 22 cm
By CJ Lopez
Midnight memories are haunting me
No more sunshines to feel the day
For no more day, or days.
I already forgotten to live
No, you killed me
For love is my strength and lies are your weapon.
Right from the start you are killing me
From time to time; slowly by slowly.
Those times I treasured are now nightmares of the past.
The more I think about it, the more it kills.
Now you are freely living your life
Leaving me here with no life.
You have killed me
I hope you’re happy.
by CJ Lopez
It is anguish inside the moment I saw it
A bad taste in one's mouth thinking about what caused this
Too much for an overflowing river in an unwanted rainy season
A late bloomer of consciousness, where is it when I need it?
It's too late now
I've decided my fate
I lost it
The battle of hearts
Who has to blame?
On the road I stopped and see,
A family who shares so glee.
The image of moment I stare,
They were so fine, so fair.
How nice it is, a family of care.
A family of joy, a family who share.
The old people’s responsibility,
Are seen done in reality.
I bid farewell to the scene.
A perfect portrait kin.
On the road I walked alone,
To face the world my own.
by CJ Lopez
Midnight thoughts of our memories,
The nights that we've been together.
Out of the blue alone,
I'm missing you.
My gypsy mind brought my heart
to an uncertain place to wander.
The escaping endeavor of oneself,
but back by your sweet gestures.
Unstable sense, tries to bring back
the old I that ones stand.
Here I am, I shout for harmony
Clear what's inside, clear my heart.
The night’s first kiss gently awakens me.
Soft touches and sweet whispers got me.
But things are better left unsaid.
Pull me closer, gently, passionately
When it is love that binds us together
How much is to unfold?
For to love is to be naked,
And there’s no room to be furtive
I am yours, you are mine.
But it seems like you don’t know how to bite back.
Those eyes aren’t towards mine
Can’t see straight, full of lies.
Don’t you know how to love? my love.
Then I’ll teach you how, let me.
We can start again, but never, again.
What might dangerous love we have
An unusual plot of a movie I never wanted.
It is when it all started bright
But it chose not to fight
Hold me, I’ll never let go
I’ll never, ever go.
Call me stupid, call me insane
I’m high with the memories,
This selfless love of pain.
Do I have to cry for you?
I speak to you, my mind teach me not to,
I don’t know, tell me, do I have to?